The Canadian government requires that a certain portion of radio and TV broadcasts be given over to Canadian content, which means that over the years Canadians have had to listen to a lot of Avril Lavigne, Sarah McLachlan, Feist, Barenaked Ladies, etc. And then there are the less, um, internationally viable Canadian acts:
I hear this song and I'm instantly seven again. (It is still playing in drugstore aisles and waiting rooms across the country, by the way.) I think this might actually be the worst music video I've ever seen, but perhaps I'm just overwhelmed by the mullets.
It's tough to determine which Canadian content is truly a "guilty pleasure", by the way. The original Degrassi Junior High (I have not seen the remake, it looks far too clean and zit-free) was ever so earnest and kitschy, but if Kevin Smith vouches for it, can it really be "guilty"? Probably not.
WHINY BRITPOP
How about some puppy dog eyes and vaguely yearning lyrics? You know you want it.
Seriously, how douchey is this? And yet.
CHICK FLICKS
I admit, I am a sucker for any movie with a makeover in it.
My current favourite in the girly fluff genre is Enchanted. Liking Enchanted isn't such a sin against taste; it's cute, if wildly illogical, and Amy Adams is superb in it — hers is one of those performances that turn a one-star movie into a three-star movie. No, what makes this a guilty pleasure is the ball of mush I turn into when watching this scene:
What can I say? The inner twelve-year-old dies hard. I swear, that kind of over-orchestrated, synth-heavy Disney music is designed to produce a Pavlovian response in women my age. Or, um, maybe just me.
JUNK FOOD
I don't drink pop (soda, Coke, whatever you call it) because I find it far too sweet, but other than that, bring it on. I have a special fondness for things involving cheese: poutine, pizza, garlic fingers (imagine a plain cheese pizza with garlic butter in place of tomato sauce), Kraft Dinner. Oh, Kraft Dinner.During exams I pretty much subsisted on Twizzlers and gummi bears. It helps to gnaw on something.
KARAOKE
Including, oh yes, Rock Band. (Guitar Hero is also acceptable, but in my opinion, Rock Band is a better game.) I recently figured out how to handle the little orange button on the toy guitar: I think this gave me only slightly less pleasure than graduating from law school. I was in an auditioned children's choir when I was a kid and never quite got over it, mentally or vocally (I still sing like a little girl). I get very excited when I score over 95% on Expert vocals.
Toronto has karaoke boxes (noree-bang?) in its Korean neighbourhoods; a former boyfriend and I have spent numerous hours embarrassing ourselves in them.
TAROT
Reading tarot cards (which I do rarely, and not well) invariably tells us what we already know, but sometimes this is helpful. Also, the images are beautiful.
OWNING WAY TOO MUCH LIPSTICK
Self-explanatory.
Oh, you hit on most of my guilties here!
ReplyDeleteI love Brit pop (from post-punk/new wave to Madchester to the new Keane types. I draw a line at Coldplay though)
I own a disgusting amount of lippie (23 tubes) and about ten of them are a soft, rose wine colour I'm trying to find the perfect shade of.
Astrology is my tarot, I'm not very good with the cards but boy are they fun in a slumber party way.
My junk food of choice is cereal. Any kind that gets soggy in my soy milk quickly, which means no Captain Crunch (you can break your teeth on that shit!)
That Glass Tiger video is hilarious, btw. I've seen worse but this is up there with the all time bad ones!
I totally forgot about Disney. Enchanted could have been a terrible movie on all levels, but as you say, Amy Adams makes it all worthwhile. I think my favorite childhood Disney is Aladdin, my favorite old one... oh, they're mostly so good, but probably Alice in Wonderland.
ReplyDeleteI got this mental image of you slaving through papers and books and gnawing at Twizzlers like a bone. Almost choked on my coffee.
Kathleen, I don't know what you're coloring is, but if you're looking for a soft rose/wine shade, try Kevyn Aucoin Enchantaberry.
Gnawing at Twizzlers like a bone...well, that's actually sort of accurate. You know, rather than decorously biting them, you sort of rip at them with your canines...it's a concise way to express frustration. :)
ReplyDeleteY'know, Kathleen, while I realize astrology is absolute pseudoscience, my own personal chart feels kind of...accurate. When I learned (back in high school) that I had no earth signs in my chart at all, I was unsurprised.
I know what you mean about lipstick shades -- my personal weakness, as I've mentioned, is reds. I'm starting to think my perfect red doesn't exist, or rather that there are many perfect reds.
Heheh. Astrology and tarot... I was obsessed with this sort of thing in middle school. I remember the moment I discovered I had a Leo ascendant and Scorpio moon - aha! That explains a lot.
ReplyDelete(Funnily enough, my chart is apparently almost identical to John Steinbeck's... which is funny since even though I consider him a good writer, I have never been a real fan of his.)
And yeah. Sometimes, only junk food can properly hit the spot (I myself had a Doritos-pigout day today).
I completely follow astrology, I do people's charts all the time. It's just a guilty pleasure because of the mystical, new age, stoner in a basement images it brings to most peoples minds.
ReplyDeleteScorpio moon, Anne? Ouch, I've dealt with a lot of those! Most of my family is Scorpio strong in some way...but not me! Johnny Cash, Elizabeth Taylor, and Bernardo Bertolucci also have your sun/moon combination, what company!
On lipstick: Kevyn Aucoin I have not tried but the shades look delightful so: will do.
Ha! I don't remember much of my chart any more; Libra sun, Leo moon, Gemini rising, and I have nothing in Scorpio except Venus, and let me tell you, despite my skepticism, this makes sense to me. :p
ReplyDeleteI kind of like stoners in basements. Couldn't be one, though. :)
Venus in Scorpio eh? ;-)
ReplyDeleteI think the Glass Tiger song is much more acceptable on its own merits... that vid is just... really bad... really, I think the obviously forced wink at the end there says it all.
It's like "One Night in Bangkok," with the giant chessboard and the "Thai" extras (played by Han Chinese actors). I loved the song, but that was before I saw the video.
Pavlovian response, lol. If Dain's list was a teenaged boy, yours is a preteen girl.